I thought I had become very neutral to what was happening in the world. I felt at peace, even though people around me were losing their jobs, living in fear of illness, and (all of us) making adjustments in our daily roles. In working with one of my reiki students, we both realized we were experiencing different aspects of the grieving process in relation to this pandemic—or whatever it is. I was willing to see my neutrality as a form of denial. Do you notice the bargaining phase that seems to be prevalent? If we just stay isolated for (x amount of) time, we will get back to whatever we had going on before, what we considered “normal.” Is there a new normal around the corner?
Remember that grief doesn’t necessarily show up as sadness, or only when a loved one dies. Perhaps the most profound aspect of grief is our transformation. We are re-establishing and re-integrating our lives without a former relation, point of reference, role, etc. Is that not what we are all being forced to do right now in one way or another? Can we appreciate the transformation? Absolutely. And during the process, I do not want you to judge yourself, or beat yourself up for not being ok, at peace, or even cheerful in the midst of what is happening. The way you feel is OK, it is normal and natural. Remember to seek reconciliation, not resolution.
It is always helpful to explore your feelings of loss, nurture yourself, and if you feel overwhelmed reach out for support from a counselor, friend, family member, minister, or coach (I am here for you).